Halifax Highlanders Moving to West Coast

[Burnaby Billionaires GM]

The Halifax Highlanders organization is announcing today that for the next upcoming Era, the team will be moving to Vancouver, BC, and will be bringing back the most successful hockey team the City has ever seen, the Vancouver Millionaires!

Current Highlanders majority owner, Hyrum Cain, announced today that the team has been purchased by local Vancouver businessman, Nathan Fielder, for $1. "We didn't really have a choice but to sell the team to Nathan after he informed us another team was selling for $1. We have a price match policy that we must follow."

Mr. Fielder will lead a new investment group that includes former NHL legends and locals Paul Kariya and Joe "Burnaby" Sakic.

Nathan Fielder:

"My name is Nathan Fielder, and I graduated from one of Canada's top business schools with really good grades. Now I'm using my knowledge to help struggling small sports franchises make it in this competitive world.

I have many exciting new ideas to bring new fans and interest to the new hockey team in Vancouver. For example, we plan on serving poop flavoured frozen yogurt at all of our games. We will also be offering delicious chili served by our concession workers wearing custom made chili suits.

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We are also proudly announcing that Rogers Arena will have be implementing an "Anyone can use our bathroom" policy. This means anyone is allowed into Rogers Arena to use our bathrooms, whether they are attending the games or not. We hope Rogers Arena will become known as the "Neighbourhood Toilet".

We look forward to implementing many new innovative and forward thinking ideas to bring success back to Vancouver!"